It's Official: I'm too big

I’d known it was coming, and I’d been dreading it. The Talk. The Talk in which my midwife would tell me that I’d gained too much weight. I got it this morning. The timing particularly stung since yesterday was a particularly gluttonous day ending with me crying in bed about how big I’d allowed myself to get. It stung to hear that I was not exaggerating.

At my first appointment I was told that I should gain 25-35 pounds over the course of the pregnancy. At 33 weeks I have already gained more than 40. I had seen the weight gain edging up ahead of schedule for a while, but it was easy to ignore when nobody official said anything about. Now it is for real. Now it is in my permanent (health) record.

I’ve been doing some good things, but I’ve been doing some bad things as well. Although I’ve done healthy things like ramp up my vegetables, I’ve also ramped up everything else. I do 90 minute Bikram sessions 2-3 times per week, but I don’t do much else in the way of exercise.

The timing of my pregnancy hasn’t helped me. The onset of winter has greatly decreased the frequency and duration of my lunchtime walks. And then there were the holidays. I gained 12 pounds from Thanksgiving to New Year’s.

The good news is that I am not yet showing the negative side effects of excessive weight gain. My blood pressure is good (even a bit to the low side). I don’t have gestational (or any other form of) diabetes. Still, I know that extra weight gain tends to mean extra baby weight gain. Bigger baby often leads to the need for more interventions. I’ve been looking forward to a natural birth. I know that cannot be guaranteed for a number of reasons, but I’s hate to have that the reason that plan changes be that I view every box of donuts brought into work as an invitation to have 3.

So now I need to get serious. I need to be strong and turn away from sweets. I need to get back on the VersaClimber (which will be scary since even the stairs to our apartment are challenging now). I need to keep doing Bikram and try for at least 3 times a week.

I can do this. I was strong when I lost weight for my wedding (which I did through healthier eating and exercise—not starving myself). I know how to treat my body better than I have been. I need to do that again. Growing this critter is the most important thing my body has ever done, and I want to do it right.